Ten more sleeps

  Amazingly, in only ten days, I will mark the achievement of a thousand consecutive days of writing this nonsense and let me remind you of the big prize giveaway I'll be doing. As I want more people reading this tosh, I'm going to be sending a little bundle of goodies, including some Revolting Balls, to whomever sends me the most email addresses of people who want to sign up. Do ask them first, thinking they want to sign up is not enough.

  And now on with the drivel. Yesterday I told you about the exciting development in Revolting ball production and that I was due to head into my helpful, local metal shop to  get fabricating. The first thing I was reminded of when I got in there and got to work is the major difference between working with metal and food. For your entertainment I took a snap of myself disguised in safety equipment as you can see below.

Are we having fun yet?

  It goes without saying that of the two, I spend more time cooking and I take for granted the pace of cooking. A substantial meal can be cooked from scratch and served up in half an hour. A few short minutes later, it's all gone and the dishes are drying up. Food appears and vanishes like a mayfly. Not so with metal. Pulling out a sharp knife is cute but it'll hardly scratch a metal sheet; heavier equipment is called for as well as a lot more accuracy.

  It's pretty easy to move food around as it's so small and light but some bits of metal need two people to (We get it. Can you move to the punchline now. -Ed.). I guess I had the romantic notion of a scene from the A-team with some funky beats and a few dynamic shots of drilling, cutting and welding with sparks aplenty. No chance.

  Anyway, as you can tell by the amount of waffle you've just got through, I'm stalling for time. I'm back in the workshop tomorrow and next week and I promise not to bore you with tales of how I managed to drill a hole. (Thank fuck for that. -Ed.). Don't forget to (please) find people who want to subscribe, you could win the goodie bag.

Kirk out

RevoltingFood.com